Woman Day

TODAY IS 'WOMAN DAY' FOR ME.

I haven't had a chance to do this for nigh-on a year (which may or may not have something to do with a Tiny Boy that arrived nigh-on a year ago:-).

I should also mention, before I go too much further, that this 'day' is only possible because my marvellous parents have taken the little fella on a big adventure into Bathurst, -quite deliberately giving me some much-needed 'me time'. For this, I am beyond grateful!

So what's a 'woman day' then?

I can already feel the narrowed eyes, suspicion and genuine fear the very title may engender...

In very basic form it is this;

* The first day of menstruation

* A day when everything in you cries out for peace, solitude and reflection.

* A day to think about what it means to be "woman".

* A day to do whatever it is that you makes you feel grounded, centred and peaceful,

Now, trust me, I KNOW that such a day is pure luxury, and well beyond the reach of many of us, -particularly if 'Motherhood' in one of the spokes to your Woman-wheel! We are expected (and expect ourselves) to 'cover-up', soldier-on, and basically pretend that everything's fine (i.e. the same as every other day).

Except it's not. Not at all.

Menstruation/The Red Moon/Aunty Flo/Kitty's got a nosebleed/The Curse is, for most of us, a dreadful inconvenience at best, a cramping/bloating nightmare at worst. 

Most women I know absolutely hate and dread it.

If you're trying to become pregnant, it's day of tears and cursing your stupid body again and again.

My point is, for most women, it is overwhelmingly negative. And it happens every month.

Recently my life has had a bit more than it's fare share of ups and downs. This has left me feeling pretty drained, annoyingly fragile, and generally pretty un-centred and uncertain. My value as 'woman' and 'wife' has been questioned LOUDLY by others, and worst of all, by me.

Luckily, I have been surrounded by a fierce cocooning shield of "Warrior-Women". Friends and Family members that have thrown back their collective heads and howled on my behalf. Teeth bared, and hackles raised, I swear every one of them was ready to fling themselves into bloody battle on my behalf.

Women, -bloody marvellous creatures! 

So today, instead of plodding through mountains of washing, cleaning, cooking, dirty nappies, tiny (but ear-splitting) tantrums, and trying desperately to 'keep it all together', I have taken a day (OK, -a morning) just for me.

This is what it looks like;

Poured a cup of ridiculously fragrant and incredible Green Tea from Ijalse Farms. Savour the warmth and fragrance of added spearmint, orange and mandarin peel...feel it doing me good...pull out an old but beloved dress made some 20 years ago by a dear friend, and remember her fragrant warmth and beautiful friendship. Make up an oatmeal and honey facial mask whilst running a hot bath scented with honey and Ylang Ylang, shed the 'workaday' clothes and slip into comforting warmth, allow it to let me dream and honour the liquid warmth of the womb, the gentle strength that is 'Mother'. Shave my legs because I want to and for no other purpose. Look, really look at belly and breasts post-baby. Feel proud that this body of mine created life, see curves and undulations as mirrors of mountains and valleys, white as the moon but with glorious signs of 'woman/mother' not virgin girl. For the first time in a very long time, realise that I don't want to look like an older incarnation of myself and that I don't want to spend these beautiful years trying to undo life in order to fit some 'image' created by others.

Slip out of the bath and into the old dress. No bra, no frills, no carry-on. Just fresh skin and freedom.

Prepare a lunch of brown rice and vegetables with no salt, but plenty of aromatic herbs and spices. It feels good to eat. I allow some time to appreciate flavour and texture. No hurrying through because I have to feed the baby, no unhealthy feelings of guilt, or 'calories' or fat'content. Just me and a meal, in the quiet.

Pull out some beloved poetry, pour another cup of tea and lose myself in the metaphysicals. See so many images I want to paint/draw/recreate in fabric and enjoy the feeling of wild freedom in my brain.

It has been utterly blissful.

Of course, I must now shed "Woman Day" and prepare for the return of my little monkey-minx.

I just wish that we all had time to do this more often.